Going Green...

This week will have a wee bit of a GREEN theme!

Let's start out with this family picture wall that I just LOVE!  Simple BRIGHT frames (I'm not sure if they are IKEA, but they have some similar.) and a painted floor runner.

So simple, but WOW!


BHG



Let Me Hold You Longer...

Etsy:  Sarah Jane Studios

This past weekend I went to a baby shower where the host read "Let Me Hold You Longer", a sweet book about encouraging parents to savor not only their children's "firsts", but the "lasts" as well.  It was incredibly moving.  With Lucy I feel like I'm gripping to her "lasts" like a mad-woman;  Her last feeding in the middle of the night, her last 1 diaper, her last bottle I hold (before her tiny hands pry it away from me), etc.

In my attention to Lucy, I realized a "last" for Jay had happened right under my nose.  

My friend Shannon had warned me about it.  Like Jay, her boys love to read and she was telling me one day months ago how strange and bittersweet it is when they start reading in their heads...another step closer to their world and yours separating.  Since then I have asked him several times..."Can you read in your head?"...His reply, "No.  I can't do that."

Jay had early release on Wednesday.  He and I LOVE these days...it is just the two of us for a few precious hours before we have to get the girls.  Sweet one-on-one time with my little.  Before we ate lunch together, I was finishing up some work while he did his homework and the house was SO quiet.  Without all the other distractions, I noticed that I was missing a little voice coming from Jay's room.

I spun around...my eyes open wide.  I burst in his room.  "Are you reading in your head?!"...He replies like it is no big deal...like it has been happening for quite some time..."Yes.  I can do that now."

In a house with loads of commotion a "last" happened for my first born...and, as it is so easy to do with the "lasts", I missed it.

Be Ye Kind.

**I get SO much encouragement from other mom-blogs!  I'm thrilled when I get ideas from them and they work in our home.  I hope that when I share ideas from our home, you feel the same way!**

Many of the blogs I read take a "word" or a "phrase" for the year.  I love the simplicity of it, so for 2013 our "phrase" is "BE KIND".  It goes along well with our "Family Motto".  During Christmas I had gotten SO fed up with the "Green-eyed Gimmies" I was completely disgusted and felt like I was failing to teach my children to think of others.

As I have written before, kids just love things when you get all fancy-pants and make a big deal about them.  A jacket with butterflies on it is transformed when a certain little girl is called "Our Lady of the Butterflies" when she wears it.  A double-wide where we spend a week each summer is a bit more magical when called "Our Summer Home".  So in the spirit of it all, I have really taken "Be Kind" and run with it.

I had a big "Family Meeting" about the phrase and

The Wheatfield

...ordered this print for the living room.

I know the Bible says that if you tell others about kind deeds then they don't really "count", but I like to think that he gives us a little wiggle room when we are teaching children.  Children are NOT born kind...they need lots of help!  They need examples of what it means to be kind.  They need confessions from us about times when we have not been kind and we are sorry. 

We are ALL born so selfish and we have to suppress selfishness our whole lives.  Sharing out loud is teaching them so much about what kind "looks like".  We have had some great discussions about what kindness is.  Basically something that you don't HAVE to do, and something you have not been ASKED to do, but you do because you know it would make someone feel loved.

So in the month of January we began sharing each night at supper one kind thing we did each day...Outside The Home.  We talked about how we do our best recognize and practice kind acts within our home so we can take kindness out into the world!  The incentive was candy (A Hershey Kiss...and now two Skittles), of course - I always find candy to be a fabulous incentive.

I want to share with y'all how amazing this "phrase" business has been after just one month!  What I love is that once I got the ball rolling, they have run with it.

-The second we are all at the table, after the blessing, they are SO excited to share what they have done kind that day...and hear our examples.  It has really changed our whole dinner focus.

-Betsy suggested a couple weeks in.  "How about we do two things kind for a Kiss?...Sure!

-Jay suggested that we write our kindness acts down and see if we can get to 100 and when we get to 100 we can do a fun family activity...Sure!

So already our goals have grown and right before my eyes my children...actually all of us...are changing our "mirrors" to "windows" and seeing the world differently. 

This is it.

Jay's First Day of 1st Grade

It took two days to hit me.  I had felt shock, fear, gratitude, worry...It took two days to feel genuinely SAD.  

Our children's program was yesterday.  It was on my mind as the kids came in.  I teared up as they sang song after song about Jesus's birth. 

The raw sadness hit when they left the stage.  Empty chairs. 18 empty chairs in the front row.  Mentally I add two more chairs.  

Empty chairs...where smiling faces had just been.

20 kids that had most likely been practicing for their own Christmas program.

20 kids, just like these joyful kids in front of me, singing about Jesus and LOVE.

20 kids that had done nothing wrong.

20 kids that have parents who will have a lasting image of a little LLBean bookbag getting smaller and smaller, then disappearing behind closed doors.

I'm holding my own tiny Lucy in my arms as the tears fall.  Her innocent smile.  Her whole life ahead of her.  

I look beside me at Justin holding my sweet Betsy.  She's so happy...feeling all fancy in her new polka dot tights.  I look over to my left and I see my first born sitting with his group, surrounded by his friends.  Adorable little faces...all dressed in their Christmas program best...little friends I'm thankful to have grown closer to in K Sunday School and VBS.  He smiles and waves. The tears keep falling.

20 chairs will be empty in their church. 
An entire classroom will be empty in their school. 

A little voice. "Mommy, why are you crying?"  It makes me cry harder to know that I can't even tell her why I'm crying because the sins of that day are too horrific.  I just say, "Because I just love you so much and am so proud of you."

Carefully selected gifts this Christmas that will be given away, unopened by their intended recipient.  Empty stockings.

Empty chairs at the dinner table.

Empty beds filled with loveys and blankies and favorite stuffed animals.

Already printed Christmas cards that will be a lasting eerie image of the final family picture.

Parents who will ask "Why?". 

Parents, just like me, who will have regrets.  Maybe one of them missed eating lunch the day before because they were too busy.  Maybe one of them was too tired to read "one more book" the night before.  Maybe one of them had a late dinner or holiday party and missed the bedtime routine.  Maybe one of them had an argument at breakfast.  Maybe one of them forgot to kiss and hug their sweet child as they got out of the car because they were on their stupid iphone.

Maybe one of them was so distracted on the ride to school that for the life of them they cannot remember the last words their child said to them...they can't remember the last words they said to their child.

Parents who will want to know that their child knew:

etsy.com/shop/thewheatfield

I pray for these families.  I pray for my own children.  I read Stormie during this storm.

Empty chairs.

This tragedy has made me pause.  It's made me reflect on my day to day.  Am I living with no regrets?  Am I being intentional about every moment?  Do I deliberately Choose to Love?  Do I talk to God enough?  Do I pray that He will be involved in every facet of my life, every moment of my day?

etsy.com/shop/thewheatfield

We are only given one life and every day is a gift. 

"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:16

May God bless the families of Newtown with peace this Christmas.  After all, its no secret that kids LOVE a party and this Christmas I know one classroom of sweet, sweet children that is will be attending one HECK of a birthday party. 

www.etsy.com/shop/vintageinclination

Through my tears, that makes me smile.

Mommy is not perfect.

At LEAST once a week I lose it...Really lose it.  An example of a "lose it" moment:

We are on our way out the door (not late yet) and I have calmly stated, "Put your shoes on" 18,000 times as I gather my all my crap together.  As as I'm FINALLY ready to walk out the door feet are bare.  "Losing it" sounds something like this:
 
"WHY ARE YOUR SHOES NOT ON?!  WHAT IS SOOO HARD ABOUT THAT?!  IN THE LAST FIVE MINUTES I HAVE GOTTEN LUCY IN THE CARSEAT, MADE A BOTTLE, PACKED A DIAPER BAG, MADE US ALL WATERS, because you asked me to and I was being NICE, PUT MY SHOES ON AND ALL YOU HAD TO DO, which I told you 18,000 times, was PUT YOUR SHOES ON!  PUT YOUR SHOES ON NOOOWWW!  and thanks to YOU, now we are late.  UHHH!"
 
This rant ends with me slamming the door to the garage, loading up my crap and starting the car.  My little ducklings stop whatever non-shoe-putting-on activity that they were doing (probably something messy that I will be cleaning up later) and they are all business getting in the car.  We ride in silence.

I seethe in silence for the next five minutes.  My jaw hurts from where I have it clenched.  Although in the moment I felt 100% justified..."I just wasn't being HEARD!", about 5 minutes later the Holy Spirit shows up and I feel really crummy.  I beat myself up and think about how childish it was for me to throw a tantrum and wonder why I can't "Choose to Love" in every moment of our day.  And my two little ducklings are very quiet and very obedient and it is eerie and weird and it makes me feel even worse.

Just like when JB and I fuss, I know I'll feel crummy until we patch things up, so that's when I put on my mommy-panties and apologize.

"Listen you two, I'm sorry that I yelled.  I love you both SO much, but I just get SO frustrated when I ask y'all to do something and no one listens to me.  Mommy works hard to get us where we need to be and I need y'all to help me by being good listeners.  Would you feel angry if you wanted me to listen to you and I wouldn't? (They nod.)  I lost my temper and the way I yelled was not loving at ALL.  Will you forgive me?"

And, just like our loving Father, they do.  They always do.  And when that thick cloud that was hanging over us all lifts, I'm so thankful and glad that I asked.  Mommy is NOT perfect, but she always loves her babies.

To Expectant Mothers...

I absolutely LOVE the post To Expectant Mothers:  A Warning over at Power of Moms.  I have to say that all of the things Becky talks about are SO true...even after your third child.

We love to laugh at Lucy's sweet faces she makes.  We ooo and ahh over every little sweet grunt and coo she makes...awake or asleep.

I take her picture ALL DAY LONG.  It's just so EASY with my iphone...and I agree with Becky that even though I take a ton, none can capture how stinkin' cute she really is.

I love how JB interacts with our newborns.  He loves to cuddle with them.  He speaks so sweetly to them.  They sleep on his chest every evening.

...plus he's a master burper!

 

I love watching Jay and Betsy and how they mimick us.  Every day their first question is "Where's Lucy?"...I love that.



I snuggle and sniff and rub her fuzzy head and give her kisses on her sweet neck and cheeks until she's annoyed.  Jay loves to do this too.  (JB tells us to quit, but we can't help it.)  I love the smell of her breath and her little wrinkled neck.







When I think of her growing up I want to cry.  When I think of "unloved" babies I want to cry.  Everytime she grows out of a sweet little outfit I want to cry.

 

 

Just Stay Little.

I am easily influenced.

A few years back a good friend told me I was "easily influenced".  At the time it bugged me and I dwelled on those two words for a long time.  You know how once you "name" something it really becomes noticeable and it's in the back of your mind nagging you?

Then something beautiful happened.  One day instead of those words nagging me I just went ahead and owned them...because they were true.  I AM easily influenced.  Let me tell ya, this was a wonderful feeling and it led me to exploring this statement about myself.  I'm a pleaser.  My "love language" is words of affirmation.  Knowing that I am easily influenced helps me to be aware that I need to surround myself with positive influences (daily prayer, good friends, Bible study groups, excellent parenting books/resources/blogs, etc.)  Over the past few years, being aware of that one simple statement has helped me GROW in my faith, friendships and parenting.

Personalities are formed at such an early age.  As my kids get older I am learning that if I observe what "makes them tick," I can parent them better.  Not only can I be better at "filling their love tanks", I can help them "name" qualities they have that we will have to nurture as they get older.  This is SO important because a quality (ie. easily influenced) can certainly be "fed" in healthy ways, but it can also be "fed" in very unhealthy ways.

Betsy is a "pleaser" for sure.  Sometimes it is a subtle "Do you like how I am listening Mommy?" and sometimes it is way more obvious.  Last night she is sitting beside me on the couch and hollers into the kitchen to JB, "Daddy, I really love this football game!"  Then she turns and whispers in my ear, "I really don't like football.  I'm just saying that because I know it makes Daddy happy."

I busted out laughing.  I'm telling you what, she's hysterical.  So many things about her are wise beyond her years and she has a VERY complex personality for a four year old.  I know that the more I observe and learn about her, the more I can help her GROW.  I'm up for the challenge!

PS:  I'm noticing WAY too many quotations here...I'm picturing myself as Chris Farley (SNL skit) flying into the air!

Lake Fun...

We bought a boat in March.  We love it!  It's such a great place for us to spend time together as a family.  We were saying the other day that we shouldn't have waited this long.  I'm glad we did though because the wait makes us appreciate our new toy all the more!

I'm very patriotic.  "The Fourth" has always been my favorite holiday...even before I had a July 4th baby.  Growing up, our family vacations were always during that week and I've been blessed to see Independence Day celebrations in most of America's greatest cities.  I get goosebumps during The Star Spangled Banner, tear up when the choir sings patriotic songs at church and LOVE a red/white/blue color combination.  That being said...One of my favorite things I've noticed about being out on the lake is the patriotism.  Whether on boats or on lake houses there are American flags everywhere!  I think it is because there is something about being so small and riding around in that big water, the wind blowing your hair, God's beauty all around you...You feel truly free.  That feeling of freedom makes me thankful and proud to live in America.


These three are pretty thankful too!

22 Weeks and Feeling Great....FINALLY!

I'm getting REALLY excited about Baby Lucy.  I'm pretty sure I'm already nesting and I'm only half-way there.  It took me 20 weeks this time to really start feeling "myself", so once I did I got to work!

I remembered really loving being pregnant, but for a long while I've been asking JB, "WHEN did I start really loving being pregnant?"...Of course his response was, "Never?  I don't remember loving it?!  First you're sick and SO tired, then the heartburn starts and stays the whole time, you have to worry with what you eat so you don't feel "too full" or "on the verge of vomiting", then you are up and down all night peeing, then you get to where the heartburn is so bad, sleeping is impossible...you can't get comfortable so you move from room to room trying to find a comfortable way to sleep sitting up..."

It's funny how us mommas remember only the good when it comes to pregnancy...and labor for that matter...and our husbands remember the bad, ALL the bad.  He rattled off that list MUCH faster than I expected him to.

Well, even though all the above is true, just recently I HAVE been loving being pregnant!  And I finally remembered at least some reasons why (JB-Read this post! :))...

• I'm OUT of the "Is she fat or pregnant?" part.  Thank goodness!  That is such an awkward phase.
• I finally have my energy back!!!
• I LOVE maternity clothes!  PLEASE can I always wear pants and skirts with an elastic waistband?!
• My absolute favorite part. - I feel Baby Lucy in my belly a lot more than a flutter.  I LOVE this!  Between Betsy and being pregnant this time I would lay in bed and have phantom feelings of a baby rolling around in my tummy.  Is that weird?  Has anyone else ever had that feeling?  Needless to say, it is much more satisfactory (and much less creepy) feeling a baby rolling around in there when you know that there actually is one! :)
• Baby Clothes!  Now that my energy is back, Mom and I pulled boxes from the attic.  I purged my boy clothes to Missy and started stacking up my boxes of girl clothes to see what I'm missing.  I've washed up all my newborn and 0-3.  Doing that is so much FUN and it took me right back to our old house when I was pregnant with Jay and folding all those sweet LITTLE clothes.

• I love that Every. Single. Time. I walk into Target I get popcorn...without the guilt!

•  I love how excited my kids are about their new sibling!  Jay was so bummed that he wouldn't be sharing a room with a little brother that BIG tears welled up in his eyes at the ultrasound.  Thankfully my mom let us use Bart's old bunkbeds anyway and both kids are BEYOND excited about that!  (Bet's been sleeping on the top bunk while Jay has been at my parent's this week.)

• I love that I know that I'm having a girl. So when Bet and I see matching dresses in a 9 mo. and 5T for next summer at TJMaxx we can both get REALLY excited!  Are these cute or what?!

• I love wondering what she'll be like.  Jay and Bet look so similar to me...Will she look like them?  Will she have curls like Bet, or straight hair like Jay?  Will she talk as much as they do, or will they never let her get a word in?  Will her infant personality be easy-going like Jay, or exhausting like Bet?  Will she play princess and "mommie" with her babies like Bet, or will she be a tom-boy?
• I love when we are out and Betsy wants to buy things for Lucy.  She has two very soft blankets that she adores..."soft-soft" and "so-soft".  She insisted when we were out the other day that she buy Lucy her first soft blanket.  So, I let her feel them all for appropriate softness and she picked out a really sweet one.  (Now I'll just have to watch close so she doesn't smother her when she tries to wrap Lucy up in it like she does her baby dolls.)

I'm sure I could keep going...I'm just so happy that I can finally come up with a list of "loves"...even though it did take 20 weeks! :)

What are some things y'all loved about being pregnant?

A few pics from our Easter weekend...

THURSDAY

Ready for the Egg Hunt at Bet's School



A zoo trip with friends...This "photo session" was a DISASTER.  Funny thing about it...while all the "big kids" were being wiggly, Sweet Tripp is patiently posing and smiling in ALL of my shots!  What a sweet boy!

Mason and Jay on the rock wall.

Tara was really proud of Jay for choosing to ride on the tiger!



Sweet Duncan's first zoo trip!

 

FRIDAY



Easter egg hunt at the McCarty's.  No time to be still for pics...These kids were on a HUNT!

 

Best I could get of the girls...Pretty sure they had mouthfuls of candy!

 SATURDAY

Games at our church's Easter Party.

More games!

Another hunt!

The bounce house was a nice surprise!

Picnic-in'.

An amazingly GREAT group shot (considering there were +/- 40 kids)!  The hunt was at a parishioner's house that just turned 99!  It was SO sweet of her, and her family, to have us all over for festivities and picnic-in'!  It was a FUN event!

Easter egg decorating...

...with Cookie!

 SUNDAY

The release of the butterflies!  The kids have watched caterpillars grow into butterflies at our Wednesday night program.  Like the tomb, the cocoon is now EMPTY!

We added some flowers from our yard to the cross.

The family in our Easter best...Isn't that cross just gorgeous?!

Uncle Bart with me and the kids.  (The Easter Bunny brought both kids their very own devotional Bibles.  (Click on link:  These devotionals are so sweet!  I highly recommend them!  AND the whole "God's Little Princess" book series.)  I was so pleased with how excited and proud they were of them!) 

Cookie and Bet with their matching Easter head flair!  Betsy's little squinty face here is too funny.  I love that little girl SO much!